Drier Than a Dirtbath in Dallas

It’s not the sort of description that you find often. Perfume is supposed to smell sweet, or floral, or spicy, or woody. But dry? Hmm….

The dryness of perfume, however, is sometimes a great selling point. Consider Hermes best selling Terre d’Hermes. Since its introduction in 2006, Terre has become the business perfume du jour. It is what European executives – both real and aspirational – now wear. The also-rans wear something that smells macho, or brisk but not unflappable. The completely effortless aplomb of Terre d’Hermes is what makes it the business parfum par excellence.

Terre d’Hermes, you see, smells cool and dry, and that, in no small part, accounts for its success. To misquote the old saw, it is not whether you are frightened, it’s whether you smell frightened, that counts. When you consider all the boardrooms across the European continent and the number of damp, trembling palms surreptitiously wiped off on pants legs under the table these days, not smelling frightened is a great boon. After all, your competitors, your colleagues and other predators, oops, creditors, can smell fear.

Wondering what to wear if you’re female and in the same pickle? Terre d’Hermes is also fine for women. But if you insist on a female version, then wear Estée Lauder’s old Alliage. It does the same sort of thing for female perspiration that Terre d’Hermes does for men’s, i.e., mask it by working with it.

You see, you have to get just a little down and dirty when you are standing your ground. You cannot flower or vanilla or, God help us, aldehyde your way out of this mess, no sissy pants scent is gonna help you out of this hole, no sir! You have to wait for high noon, loosen your gun in its holster, and wipe that sweat off your brow.

And think of Clint.

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